It is my belief that play serves as a doorway to the heart of us. As children, we have natural instincts that pull us into play, but somewhere along the line many of us lose our capacity for play. There are many reasons, but perhaps what matters most is that our capacity for play can be cultivated and deeply impact our sense of self. Stuart Brown, a psychiatrist and play researcher, began his work studying violence in the 1960’s. He realized in his work studying violence that there was a throughline connecting many of the people who engaged in violent acts.
He notes in an article that “severe play deprivation had major negative behavioral consequences” – and not just for children. After all, what would life be without play? In his TED talk, Brown states the following:
“Now, the program says that the opposite of play is not work, it's depression. And I think if you think about life without play -- no humor, no flirtation, no movies, no games, no fantasy and, and, and. Try and imagine a culture or a life, adult or otherwise without play. And the thing that's so unique about our species is that we're really designed to play through our whole lifetime.”
Dr. Brown’s research on play invited me to deeply my life and my circumstances – do I allow myself to play? What does play look like for me? Well, I continued to dive into Brown’s work – specifically, Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul, and investigate what play really was and he offered 7 properties of play:
Purposelessness
Considering play has significant purpose in our lives, this is a tough consideration. However, Brown indicates that “apparent purposelessness” may be more appropriate. In a country and world where capitalism drives our need to produce and earn our way, play can seem purposeless. While it may not garner material advantage or pay the bills, play does indeed serve us.
Voluntary Nature
This feels somewhat self-explanatory, however the act of play theoretically has no obligatory aspect. Obligation can take what would be an act of play and turn it into a chore.
Inherent Attraction
One should ideally be interested in the activity – it should not feel boring, it should feel exciting. Activities that are play invite us in.
Freedom from Time
Have you ever sat down to your favorite board game or book and gotten so engaged that you realized that it has been HOURS! When engaged in play, we experience freedom from the restraints of time and the demands of commitments.
Diminished Self-Consciousness
Psychologically speaking, this is a loss of ego. Maslow might have referred to this feeling as “peak experience,” while Csikszentmihalyi may have called it “flow.” To put it simply, we forget to worry about how we appear or seem to others when in play.
Improvisational Potential
In a world where certainty is often sought after at too high a cost, play is one of the places we can experience chance, change, and serendipity without it being as risky as it might feel in our personal lives. We can explore doing things without a set course and cultivate mindfulness about how our stories unfold.
Continuation of Desire
This is the feeling of not wanting the fun to end. When observing dogs playing with one another, often the stronger or faster dog will intentionally slow-up to allow for the fun to go on longer. Sometimes we change the rules to prolong the fun.
So what?
Well – this why, among other reasons, I believe Tabletop Role-Playing Games like Dungeons and Dragons (DND) have been growing in popularity within therapeutic scenes. Role play, especially when facilitated by a knowledgeable therapist and game master, has the potential to create a container in which participants can explore the world safely. Players/clients can use TTRPGs to work through myriad issues ranging from identity exploration, trauma, cultivating social skills, and more.
Clients will tackle the very things in the game that they themselves struggle with, and it provides clinicians with an opportunity to learn deeply from clients about their experiences. Imagine an individual – young or old – who feels like there is too much at stake to explore their gender identities and presentations. Players in these games can explore themselves and learn what feels right to them through their engagement with a character they have created.
As a clinician who focused much of their education and work experience surrounding trauma, I wholeheartedly believe that play can be a significant part of the healing process. Trauma fractures and disconnects us from others and from ourselves – it leads us away from connection and towards protection. Given this, playing with others in a format that is inherently less risky than “real life” has deep potential to begin the rewiring process for community and connection.
Generally speaking, I invite everyone to consider how to broaden and build upon their experiences of play. Play for me does not necessarily mean that the same experience is also play for you, but we all have a neurobiological need for play in our lives. If you think you might be interested in exploring role-play and TTRPGs in a therapeutic environment, I encourage you to connect with your local practices and see if they can refer you to a credible option.
If you are local to Durham, NC – I welcome you to reach out to my email at ben@essentialcts.com or schedule time with me at https://www.therapyessential.com/client-portal.
Daring Greatly,
Ben Pruitt
LCSWA, MDiv
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